How to get a girl into bed~ as requested by Pookyma

Dey brother....you must have some difficulty in getting some action kah? Desperate izzit? Which part of earth do you live la?

Follow these simple steps..
1. Find a target - No need to know the girl wan. But you have to pick one that is realistic to your capabilities. C'mon, have to seek market value maa or else sure loose out with penis hanging to dry only.

2. Think before you talk - this one is a common mistake. Although at this point your dick says cum cum cum~! But what you might want to do is fish fish fish. Start with casual talk. Dig into the targets personality and use lots of expressions. Owh and when the target talks...listen and shut up.

3. After about 20 minute into talking then can start with mild flirting. This one I don't have to teach right? But remember not all targets will fall for the same trick. So it is good to watch movies to take cues on what are the various ways.

4. After one hour it should be prime time to gently ask. Remember no forcing~ if you don't get it tonight there are other nights. So don't sound so bloody desperate lah.

5. Always make educated judgement. Don't use your dick all the time.

There 5 simple steps. Too general you say? Of course lah~ so many women out there surely cannot be using off the shelf tactics right? Like that you will be boinking the same type of girl all your life....now that is more boring than sex with a Llama.

Re: How the avoid THE question.

Hoho...but out of all asnwers u came up with...just use 1 general answer over and over again. For example. "Wait la"...or the classic "are u talking to me" and just ignore. All the favorite is still..."ntah~". No one can qrgue with "ntah". Short and precise. Who the fuck knows anyway about the future.

For instance i never knew i would sell my Honda and live without a car for months...and perhaps few years to come...

Meet Achmed the terrorist.

This is fucking funny man~ you buggers better watch this shit cause he is the shit~! Or else~ I KILL you~!!! MUuhahahahah~!

Tips on how to avoid THE question.

Yes it is THE question that most guys would love to avoid~! Let me put it in bold...

KO BILER NAK KAHWIN AH?

Classic question kan? What else lah....I got a whole list of answers to choose from.

1. Have better things to think about.
2. Where got farking money?!!
3. Why? You wan to sponsor mah?
4. Why? You have someone in mind for me kah?
5. I am asexual.
6. I am on a mission. Perhaps after THE mission I'll think about it.
7. What for? I am still young maa~
8. No freedom lei~ all also need to report wan. Leceh maaa...
9. No girl like me
10. I like boys (sarcastic tone)
11. I can't share a bed.
12. Lesser mouths to feed the better.
13. Why not you get hitched first than you tell me how it's like.
14. Sleep with one person only?!!...Boring seh~!
15. Cannot hang out with the guys no more.
16. I don't want to delete all my porn collection.
17. When BN no longer run the country.
18. When Samy Vellu retires.

Actually got a lot more.....some so ridiculous even I don't believe what I say sometimes. But hey...as long can run away from the topic kira ok lah hor? Plus I try to avoid attending weddings whenever I can.

Loh....been busy with someother shit.

Like how la want to write here? One dude does one topic then another does an entirely different topic. All so messed up. I get confused man. So I want to get the ball rolling.....I start with a topic and all 3 fucks have to submit an entry.

So my 1st topic is...how to get a girl in bed.

Hahahah~! get your creative juices flowing and share your experience. Heheheh~!

Whoa...u guys are real shit!

Since the last entry...no one write anything...u guys really assholes! Fuck you fucks!

A product of failure

Bro...give the dude a break la weh...a lot in his mind...there 1 side to consider, and other side to consider. What u said just now, "parents have no say" also true. But better think back parents brought you into this world so you can fuck only ke? So...try to be delicate as well...why put yourself in win-lose situation when you can always put yourself in win-win situation. You wanna settle down for second best? fuck you nimamok...i'm just going for the best...but...there is always Wei See u can consider. HAHAHAHAHA!

Be cool with your life. Time will reveal everything, whether you deserve an angel or maybe you'll end up becoming a lonely motherfucker...when u get older...a lonely grandmotherfucker...be patient my friend.

Now, i shall cheer u up with an old jokes from the east. 4 friends went for a drink at one shop located at kuala berang. They call the waitress to make an order. Thus the first 3 friends order the drinks they desired until the fourth;

Waitress: Nok minum ape? (What do want to drink)
4th Guy: Kawe nok kawe sebuk... (If i want, i will tell)

So waitress go at the back and bring the drinks the guys ordered...the 4 guys shocked that the waitress bring back 4 glasses of drinks. As the memory serve them right, only 3 guys ordered...and hence the 4th guy ask the waitress. "Air gapo hitang legik banyok buih pulak tu"...and the waiter said..."air kawesebuk"...

For your info...in kelantanese dialect..."kawe sebuk" similarly sound like "carlsberg"...thats why the 4th guy get a carlsberg for a drink.

man you guys make me wanna scream !!!

last week I tot I was in love :P now fucking shitz I am fallen out of love ! I knew I should have paid for better breaks !! fuck this and that ! anywayz I wont give up !!

easier said then done, now days its just not so easy to find a soul mate man ! what does a chinese gingo need to do to attract a wife man !!!!

anywayz I still think Rauff is making the right choice even if every fiber of his being is saying swing away !!

Chill brother. Love will Find the way !! * Vomits ...... sorry its sooooo cheesy to say that line hehehe.

Me also la~

Hehe...serve your skinny ass right...after this, saves all the money u can and sure your skinny ass gonna be even skinnier. You have condemned yourself for 24/7 pleasure of making love at anytime in which is "Halal". And u have condemned yourself to see only 1 women until end of your life. LoL...thats why when u wanna get married...find the prettiest girl...so, u won't get bored until the age of 50...after that...aiyayaya...haha...

By the way, isn't it awkward seeing rauff the wild stallion having a bunch of wild stallions jr.?

Wei~! I itchy want to get married and need people to visit my new blog.

Last couple of weeks ha been really fast. So many things happening, giving me a headache. Sometimes I forget which is heads or tails. I just made a commitment or condemn my self to one, which ever way you want to see it.

All the sudden have to plan for this and that. So much details and I think time is never enough. Still the proposed wedding is in 2009 but the heat of it all is creeping up. I feel so you know (lost of words)..... sometimes.

Anyhow do visit my new blog www.achmedrauff.com. Click on the ads too...sponsor my wedding in 2009 maaaa :D Hehehhe~!!!